Support
“Wives,
understand and support your husbands in ways that show your support for
Christ.” Ephesians 5:22 (MSG)
Your husband should know you’ve got his back. You are his
biggest cheerleader and the president of his fan club. If he has a dream, have
enough vision to help him. Let him know
that you believe in his dreams. Then get in there and help him achieve them.
Don’t be a spectator on the sideline waiting for him to fail. If you don’t know
what to do, ask him how you can help him. It may be as simple as fixing him a
cup of tea while he’s up burning the midnight oil.
Serve
“Whoever
wants to be great must become a servant.” Mark 10:43 (MSG)
Servant is not a bad word. It doesn’t mean you’re in the
dungeon with a ball and chain. Showing your love by acts of service is not a
bad thing. For some people, acts of service is their primary love language. But
whatever his love language, your husband will appreciate you having a spirit of
service. Fix his plate. Yes, he has two legs, but do it as an act of
love and service. Surprise him and take out the garbage or another task that
will help him out. As Christians we should have servant hearts. Jesus said he
came to serve and not be served. If Jesus, the Son of God, can wash his
disciples feet, surely we can rub our husbands every once in a while.
Speak Life
“Words
kill, words give life;
they’re either poison or fruit—you choose.” Proverbs 18:21 (MSG)
they’re either poison or fruit—you choose.” Proverbs 18:21 (MSG)
Life and death are in power of tongue. The tongue is hard to
tame and too many of us have killed people with our tongues, including our
spouses. I have heard women tell their husbands to shut up in public. Not good.
Treat and speak to others the way you want to be treated. Just because he’s a
man doesn’t mean he doesn’t have feelings. Don’t embarrass him, especially in
front of other men. You don’t have to say whatever comes to mind when you want.
Have wisdom to know when to say some things. To you it may not be nagging, but
to him it is. The book of Proverbs has several scriptures about a “nagging”
spouse. For example:
“A
nagging spouse is like
the drip, drip, drip of a leaky faucet;
You can’t turn it off,
and you can’t get away from it.” Proverbs 27:15-16 (MSG)
the drip, drip, drip of a leaky faucet;
You can’t turn it off,
and you can’t get away from it.” Proverbs 27:15-16 (MSG)
Don’t be a leaky faucet. Know when to turn
it off.
Compliment him. Praise him. Encourage him. Thank him for
what he does. Write him note. Tell him
you love him. Speak well of him to others. Let your words bring him life.
Seek his counsel
“Take
good counsel and accept correction—
that’s the way to live wisely and well.” Proverbs 19:20 (MSG)
that’s the way to live wisely and well.” Proverbs 19:20 (MSG)
You know you can do it yourself. Maybe you have all the
answers. But maybe it wouldn’t be a bad idea to seek your husband’s counsel.
Even if it is just to let him know that you respect his opinion and thoughts.
We all need to be needed sometimes and men are natural problem solvers. Let him
know that you value his thoughts and ideas. Spouses tend to balance one another
out and he may have just the perspective that you need or sees something you
never thought about.
Sex
Therefore
a man leaves his father and mother and embraces his wife. They become one
flesh.
The two of them, the Man and his Wife, were naked, but they felt no shame. Genesis 2:24 (MSG)
The two of them, the Man and his Wife, were naked, but they felt no shame. Genesis 2:24 (MSG)
God made sex for marriage and he made it to
bond a husband and a wife. It is how men connect. To quote Steve Harvey from
his best-selling book, Act Like a Lady,
Think Like a Man (which I have never done), “We need to be physically engaged with
the woman we love, the woman who is loyal to us and supports us, and the way
that we do that is by making love….the way we men connect is by having sex.
Period. It’s how we plug in, recharge, and reconnect.”
If
you love your husband and want to show your love, connect with him physically. Make
love. Don’t use sex as a weapon to manipulate but view it as a gift from God to
celebrate your union. You might have to work on it. Plan it. Buy some sexy
lingerie. Send the kids away. By any
means necessary, make a way to connect.
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